Kevin Jackson » Humor

Do Penguins Fly?

kevinjackson — Wed, 20 Dec 2006 02:43:19 +0000

Here is a really nice short directed by Alban Lelievre.

Love the snappy animation.

[youtube]EnlCz1P95WM[/youtube]

It’s gonna be in 3D! or is it…

kevinjackson — Mon, 13 Nov 2006 19:42:59 +0000

Maya Battles – Round 5

kevinjackson — Mon, 30 Oct 2006 21:37:51 +0000

I’ll raytrace your face
and then I’ll Displace you,
Bump Map your mom
and then I’ll Replace you

You’re menu set is wrong
Press F2 for Animation,
Now I’ll adjust your face
Deform > Soft Modification

I could be Near or Far
You’d have no way of knowing,
your clipping plane is off
the grid is the only thing showing

I’ll Gimble-lock your wrist
at 360 degrees
Leave you twisted
With broken tangents on your keys

Humiliation…

Maya Battles – Round 4

kevinjackson — Fri, 27 Oct 2006 07:23:13 +0000

I’m Maya Unlimited
you’re just PLE
You better upgrade
if you wanna get in this Ctrl+G

They call me smooth and rigid
cause I got you all in a bind,
and when I get done with your clipping plane
you’ll be practically blind

You’re one big Dope Sheet
fumbling over your keys,
Get out of my motion path
And don’t trip over my CV’s

I will disorient you
like the last joint in your chain
Pin you to the plane
with a Geometry Constrain

Maya Battles – Round 3

kevinjackson — Thu, 26 Oct 2006 07:58:24 +0000

You know what time it is…

Translate Z
and Rotate X,
one false move
I’ll split your vertex

My cut faces tool
will extract you fool,
Don’t try to subdivide
Or our meshes might collide

You’re like the kid in class
who keeps hitting the caps lock key,
and can’t figure out why
Nothing’s happening when you press P

You’re workflow is outdated,
Like yesterday’s news
So forget about Ctrl+Z
With those finite Undo’s

Maya Battles – Round 2

kevinjackson — Wed, 25 Oct 2006 02:16:52 +0000

You know what time it is! Time to completely humiliate your co-workers in front of your friends and peers with your massive CG Rap ego.

What’s a matter son?
Render globals got your tongue?
Is that why
your fingers glued to F1

I’ll smooth your proxy
quicker than you can hot box,
space bar, two clicks…
to late, I just closed the option box

I’ll discipline you like a child
quicker than you can Shift+P,
and forget about undo
I just deleted your history

Better Ctrl+H your selection
before I Boolean > intersection,
I convert Nurbs
to Polygonal perfection

Ooooooh! I’d hate to be on the receiving end of that thrashing… how embarassing.

Maya Battles – Round 1

kevinjackson — Tue, 24 Oct 2006 03:40:11 +0000

Here are some new rhymes for those Maya users out there who like to battle their co-workers about who is better at their part of the pipline. Don’t pretend like you’re not one of those people.

I’ll planar map you
To the bottom of my shoe,
Leave your UV layout
Looking like a pile of poo

Better be on the lookout
For another job possibility
Cause I’m coming to visit
And clean up your topology

Normalize your UV’s
Before I clamp down your keys
Spline it
Refine it
Modify > freeze

Select plane
Modify > Make live,
My dynamics
will send you back to Maya 6.5

Gallerie Abomin8

kevinjackson — Wed, 18 Oct 2006 19:12:35 +0000

For a collection of some of the most… interesting CG on the web, check out the Gallerie Abomin8 (I can’t actually spell out “abomin…” because spam bots automatically leave porn comments).

Tips for Animators

kevinjackson — Tue, 17 Oct 2006 02:37:01 +0000

Just a little word of advice for Maya animators. It’s a good idea to pick-walk up to the nearest joint when animating. Remember that the controls you have setup are only to make it easier to select the part to animate. So when you select the curve, you need to pick-walk up a few times (more then once just to make sure you get it) and then you can begin animation. The curve is only there for ease of selection of what really needs to be animated.

I know that this is hard to remember, here’s a few rhymes that may make it easier:

Pick-walk, pick-walk,
One, two, three..
Pose that limb,
Now set a key…

Select that curve,
Pick-walk up,
Now you’re ready,
To tear it up.

Control selected,
Joint neglected…
pick-walk up,
Selection corrected.

The TD’s will love you if you keep these in mind, I’ll post more as they come to me.